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Tagboard

Wednesday, December 24, 2008 [2:30 AM]

think my life is pretty screwed and no motivation at all...no motivation to work...no motivation to do anything...

i admire and respect his position at work...can do bar can do service...both also do till a almost perfect job...make customers happy and stuff...keep having regular customers coming back...bt wat the hell can i do?nth...take wrg orders, make customers angry, cant even learn bar much less a pay rise like him... feedback letters nt even a quarter of his...regular customers coming back just for me and speed...don even talk abt them...im so worthless compared to him...if the company wanna cut down on labour cost bet i ll be on the list far earlier than he will be...im so useless and so nt motivated at all...so nt...

and i wonder...why cant my love life be simpler?when i see couples ard, it often left a hole in my heart...and remind me of him...why cant things be simple btwn the both of us?is it because we try to analyze things too much?or because we cant give wat each other wants?bt at the end of the day, do we still love each other as much?perhaps there are stil many more painstaking truths which we do not wan to face...